Wednesday, December 11, 2013


a little happiness from the hoop today :)
top: sam+lavi
skirt: sam+lavi
vest: madison marcus

sometimes i find myself in desperate need of true perspective

all of this i word hooplah that we have been dealing with for the last year and a half has intensified that need ten fold
what i struggle with is that the longer we trudge through this the harder perspective is to focus on .. or really care about

it is easy to just get wrapped up by the darkness of the hurt and lose sight of all that is good

in the last year and a half my faith has been tried more that any other time in my life but the perspective i am focusing on today is that my GOD is in control

He knows our future
He knows the entire story
He knows our baby

something i have said to many people is that we feel the emptiness of our arms more and more everyday
that is true .. we so desperately want a little angel to snuggle and love and raise

i don't understand why this is our path
i don't know why we were intended to endure all that we have
but i do know that one day we will have a baby and that will make every bit of this worth it

every tear
every doubt
every tense moment
every heart break

when we get to hold our baby for the first time .. i will be infinitely grateful for every single thing that will have brought us to that moment .. that child .. good and bad

i receive a daily devotional from the girlfriends in GOD and today's message was about mary and what she had to have been feeling and thinking when she received the news that she would give birth to the Son of GOD. the prayer at the end was sent straight to my heart ..

heavenly FATHER, when i think about how mary must have felt, my heart swells. her willingness to be Your servant, her faith to believe the angel, and her trust that You would accomplish what You had planned stirs me to do the same. LORD, i am willing to do whatever You have for me to do. i have faith that nothing is impossible for You. i trust that You will always do what is best for me. may it be said of me, “blessed is she who has believed that what the LORD has said to her will be accomplished.”
in JESUS’ name .. amen

i beleive strongly that GOD put the desire to have children and to adopt on our hearts .. i just have to keep perspective that He is in control and what He has said will be accomplished

happy wednesday!!

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